Kinsey

Kinsey has a theory about sexual orientation, it is called the Continum theory.

The line graph goes from zero to six and zero is very heterosexual, a six is homosexual and three is bisexual and every other number is somewhere in between. He believes that you can be a two or a five as well. Every person is different and every person feels different about others.

Sexual Orientation

Sexual orientation seems to only be an issue if it is homosexual, because it is not the common orientation.

1) Terms

        - Sexual orientation - Direction of a person’s sexual interest either other sex or some sex

        - Heterosexual orientation - Sexual interest in other sex involves attraction more in depth emotional attraction

        - Homosexual orientation - Sexual interest in same sex involves attraction more in depth emotional attraction

        - Erotic dimension -   erotic interests can me hetero-erotic or homoerotic

2) Roles

        - Barry Adam

            - Complexity

            - Talking about more than just sex when talking about attraction

            - Emotional possibility of attraction

            - Desire of strong connection

      - Classification issues

            - No uncontroversial classification of sexual orientation

            - Many people have been attracted to both sexes at one point in their life

            - Peoples interests change over time

            - Not as straight forward as it seems

I think that people that are homosexual or bisexual should be accepted for who they are. I do not think that just because people are attracted to the same sex, which is different from the norm, that they should be punished for that. They cannot help it that they are attracted to the same sex that is just how they were born and to treat a person differently because it is mean and I do not think that it should to tolerated. I think people that are homophobic, can choose to keep it to themselves, and honestly I think that if people did not make such a big deal about someone being homosexual that they would be easier accepted and people would be more open to accepting their differences. 

Communication Skills

Communication skills involve talking about sex, love, caring, passion, self absorption, feeling

1) General Thoughts

         - Verbal communication cause/solve problems

         - Communication skills is strongly related with level of intimacy

2) Obstacle

         - Vulgar to talk about sex

                      - Not polite to talk about sex

         - Irrational beliefs

                      - Ex - Expecting other person to read my mind

3) Getting Started

        - Have to select appropriate time and place

        - Ask permission

        - Give permission

4) Listening Effectively

        - Most powerful aspect

        - Do not interrupt

        - Paraphrasing

-Be sensitive when talking about sex

From experience I found that just being open about the subject is way easier than keeping at all inside. I think that the person you are having sec with would appreciate it if you do talk about how you feel about things and are open about the matter. Also I think that it helps a lot if you are specific and not afraid to talk about it because if you are not then you leave the other person guessing and that just sets both of you up for great confusion.

De-Romancifying Relationships and Intimacy

1) Social Exchange Theory
            - Looks at relationships as an exchange (commerce)
            - Subjective cost benefit analysis
            - Comes from Broader Theory rational choice theory
2) ABC(DE)
            - Comes from George Levinger
            - Can be used for any kind of relationship
     A- Attraction - initial attraction
     B- Building
     C- Continuation
     D- Deterioration - when someone stops trying
     E- Ending

Sternberg's Triangular Model of Love

This is Sternberg's Triangular Model of Love



I think that this model of love is pretty interesting. I think people that are in relationships do not just have one kind of love in this triangle. People go to phases in their relationships, at one point they may have only commitment, or only passion, and at others they may have consummate love. I know that from my exerience I did not always feel all three things in my relationship, there were times that I did but there were other times when only the commitment was there. Also I think that people need to realize that most relationships have ups and downs and that a persons relationship cannot always be consummate love.

Attraction

There are the three main things that make a person attractive
1) Beauty
      - This Changes in time and the place you are in beauty is defined by culture
      - Self-concept - how one feels about their body
             - Men usually think their body is good, women usually do not think that they have a nice body
      - People that are attractive do tend to know that they are
2) Non-physical Trait
      - These are things like: liking someone, knowing someone, respecting someone, feeling comfortable, and          sharing similar values and goals
      - Women like a more forceful personality and men like the opposite
      - Gender extremes tend to be attracted to each other
3) Long Term
      - Buss - Women are most attracted to a man that can be a provider. Men are most attracted to a women that is sexually attractive. Because of this theory, we usually find that women are younger then their spouce. Women are most attractive in their youth and mens peak of providing is usually when they are older.
                 - Partners tend to be similar in attrctiveness.
                 - Long term relationship tend to develop from a pool of eligables
                 - Women tend to value more personality traits
                 - Men tend to value physical traits
                 - Reciprocity - it is almost impossible to resist someone that likes you

Romeo & Juliet

1) Love as a Question
         - Something undefinable
         - Romeo & Juliet are both adolescence
2) Greek Influence
        - Starge - The love a mother feels for their child
        - Agape - The love of generosity. An example of this would be wanting to help the homeless
        - Philia - love of friendship
        - Eros - Remantic love. Examples of this are passion, fire, and desire
3) Infatuation/Romantic Love
      - Infatuation - Intense absorbtion
                         - Can involve passion
                         - Most movies are about infatuation (falling in love)
       - Romantic Love - Idealized in our society
                                  - Mature love
                                  - Not Nessisarly preceeded with infatuation
                                  - See infatuation as leading to romantic love
                                  - Having a deeper attachment and greater degree of caring
                                  - Long term

I agree with the different kinds of love, I think that you can love many people, but yes it is a different kind of love when you love a friend, then when you love a family member. Also I think that most relationships do start with infatuation and then move onto romantic love, I dated a guy for two and a half years, but I have known him since I was five, and we still went though the infatuation stage. The reason I think that every relationship goes through this is because you still have that moment that you realize that you love a person and want to be with them and that is when the infatuation part of the relationship begins.

Caster Semenya

Caster Semenya was a world class athlete, she was winning all her races. They then questioned her gender and it was all over the media.

I think that first of all if you do question someone’s gender please do it in a private manner, it is her own business and not the whole world needs to know. Also if she is or is not a female or hermaphrodite she cannot help it, she is a good runner and no one can take that away from her, she loves what she does and I think that she will keep running for as long as possible. I do understand that the people that she is running against may find that she has an unfair advantage because Caster has a higher level of testosterone running through her body but I think it still does not give them the right to publicly question her gender.

Gender

1) Gender roles & stereotypes
   - Gender role defined - " a complex cluster of ways in which males and females are expected to behave" - from human sexuality (the textbook)
   - Stereotype defined- "fixed conventional idea about a group of people" - from the textbook
2) Sexism
   - Sexism defined - " a pre judgement that because of gender a person will posess certain negative traits" - from the textbook
   - Double standards – the same actions are good for one gender but not for the other one
               - an example of this is when a guy sleeps with many girls he is seen as the man and everyone wants to be his friend, but when a girl does the same thing she is seen as a slut and nobody likes her anymore.
3) Aggression
    - Regarding gender roles & aggression both gender roles can be aggressive just in different ways.
4) Gender Typing
    A) Biological
             1) Evolutionary perspective - men have to be strong to do the heavy work
                    - need to survive women is caring and nurturing. This concept just carried on through the years.
             2) Prenatal Brain Organization - neurological perspective, everything occurs in the brain
    B) Psychological
            1) Freud - Oedipus Complex
                                 -Oedipus was a story about a man that married his mother and killed his father, Freud links this to gender
                             - He says that for the child the father is competition for the mothers attention.
            2) Social Cognitive - Blending of social relations and cognition
                                          - Learning through observation
                                          - Identification
                                          - Socialization
                                          - Observation and modeling is the main thing of this concept
            3) Cognitive Development Approach - Kohlberg
                                          - Learns concepts and ideas about gender through observation
                                          - Nations of how boys and girls are supposed to behave they see that their mother is feminine and father is masculine     
            4) Gender Schema Theory
                                         - Information processing theory
                                         - Information comes in and we process it and act upon it, respond accordingly             
5) Psychological Androgyny
    - have traits from both genders
    - Sympozium is a book written by Plato but everything that Plato writes was said by Socrates
                    - The book pretty much says that everyone used to be a hermaphrodite and then people got split in two and that is why people are attracted to the opposite sex because they miss the body parts they lost.